And what actually is the difference between pearl, off-white and just plain regular cream?‘That sales assistant is a dick…’
She’s snooty, she’s trying to up your budget, and she’s making all the wrong noises when yanking you into that corset. You always wear a size 12, and she better know it.
These dresses are heavier than all of your other clothes combined and you’re putting them on and taking them off at an alarming speed. Forget the pre-wedding diet, this is your workout.
‘Why aren’t we all swilling champagne while onlookers gather to tell me how lovely I look? Why isn’t my mum even crying?’
‘I’m a failure. My friends / bridesmaids / own mother are so bored right now and totally hate me.’ Spoiler; all will be forgiven when you finally find The One and you’ll be looking back and LOL-ing in Costa before you know it.